Decisions, Decisions

So it would seem that no one know the answer to last posts song. Well the hint is, I've used the band before. As for this song, it should be rather simple to figure out. Good luck.







Have you ever felt like you were in a bad dream and you couldn't wake up no matter how hard you tried? I can say that I have. In fact, I've felt like that for the last 7 months. I keep trying to tell myself that its all a bad dream and I will wake up with Brittany in my arms and school going great and no problems at all. But then I get what those in the biz call a reality check and I realize its the exact opposite these days. For those who don't know(everyone but John Marshall, Mom, and Dad) I'm not taking any classes this semester. I have been kicked out of the dorms and am now living out of car. Luckily I have Awbrey and Amanda who are willing to let me sleep on their floor and use their shower. It's a long story as to how this all happened so here goes. I applied for a student loan and with the help of my extremely gracious mother was approved for one. It was approved right around a week and a half to two weeks before classes started. I figured I was good, wrong. I move into the dorms and have all the classes I want to take picked out, now all I have to do is wait for the check to come in. No big deal, wrong again. A week into classes starting I still hadn't received the check. So I call the loan bank to see whats going on, they tell me they are still waiting for conformation from the school. So I call the financial aid office of the university. They proceed to tell me that they are 2 weeks behind on getting those conformations out, I tell them that I can't take classes without that check and they tell me all we can do is wait and it will get done. So I ask if there is a way to speed it up and of course there isn't a way. So now we play the waiting game, all while I'm missing out on class. Then on Sept. 12 I get off work and am going to get into my dorm and my card won't let me in. Odd, I think to myself, so I end up waiting for someone else to go in so I can follow behind them. I go and check my school e mail and sure enough there is a letter telling me I have to leave the dorms by the 12th since I'm not taking any classes. Which is their fault. By this time I'm pissed. So I wait for monday and call them. There is still nothing they can do and I do have to leave the dorms. Nothing I could say or do could convince them that it was their fault and they are f***ing me over. Just kept telling me that I have to leave unless I could pay. So obviously I left, and now I don't know what I'm going to do. Just have to wait it out I suppose. So when I'm home for my birthday for over a week, I don't want to have to tell the story over and over. If you ask I will just tell you to read my blog. But anyways, can you understand why I wish I was just having a bad dream. Hasn't been the greatest 7 months of my life. But when you are as low as I am you can only go up, right? Thats how I will look at it anyways. Just have to keep plugging along.




Oh, and another thing. Why do my thoughts always bring me back to Brittany? Can you tell me why that is Crystal? Why do I think if I was still with her things would be different? I can't seem to stop thinking about her. I can't let go of the hope in the back of my mind that we will be together again one day even though I know it won't happen. I just can't let go..... I want to but I'm too scared to let go completely. Maybe I just need more time. Only one way to find that out, I'm sure this isn't the last you've heard of this. Sorry you have to read about this but like Elizabeth said this is more for yourself than it is for others. I'll be glad to look back on all this when its over and be able to laugh at myself for fretting over such small problems.

Radio

This song really has nothing to do with this post, I just really like the song. This is an awesome song! Even better live too, I would say thats a hint but I've seen like close to 50 bands. But I suppose it narrows it down a bit. Oh, and I just tried google and not so much for this song. So, good luck. If it gets bad enough I can give a hint. :)



Soooooooooooooo. If you hadn't heard I turned 21! Woo hoo! It was quite the eventful day. I woke up and was taken out to eat by my best friends, we had Logan's Steakhouse. And, yes, it was good. After that I went to their apartment and played Hobowars for a bit. Then Amanda decided she needed to get a charger for her new cell phone, she lost her old one and had to get an old one from Awbreys grandparents, its a long story. So we all went to the AT&T store only to find out they dont sell those types of chargers anymore. So they tell us to go to Wal-Mart. So we go there, and of course, they don't have it. So Awbrey calls his grandparents and they tell him its the same kind of charger for their new phones, and they have Alltell. So off to the Alltell store we go. They have it and we get her a charger. So then we had to back to AT&T so she could get a new sim card. Finally we get it all taken care of and we go back and play some more Hobowars. Then they decide to go to Wal-Mart and not wanting to be the odd man out and stay home I go with them. Nothing crazy happens there, except the normal weird stuff that happens at any Wal-Mart. So then we finally got back to the apartment to stay. I missed out on a lot of awakeness but its ok, I had fun. I then proceeded to play Hobowars for the night until 9:30 and then went to Taco Bell and then to my dorm to play more Hobowars. I'm such a nerd. But I had fun.







Now that that boring story is over with we can get to the real fun stuff. Haha, not. I have been working on the whole Java stuff, but I've hit a brick wall. It's a little more difficult than I imagined to make a simple button work when it gets clicked. You have to make what they call a mouse listener, which is exactly what it sounds like. It waits and "listens" for the button to be clicked. Then you have to make each action that could be made. For example, mouseClicked(), or mousePressed(), or mouseReleased(), mouseEntered(), and mouseExited(). When used within a program it looks like this:

public void mousePressed(MouseEvent evt);
public void mouseReleased(MouseEvent evt);
public void mouseClicked(MouseEvent evt);
public void mouseEntered(MouseEvent evt);
public void mouseExited(MouseEvent evt);

These are just the basics. For those who understand a little bit of programming, what you write inside the parenthesis is what action is taken when the specific action is taken. If that makes sense. Basically what you would do is put what you want to happen in place of the evt in the parenthesis. If I am incorrect please correct, this is just how I understand it from reading about it. I am still trying to teach myself all about this and any help would be appreciated. Thats about it for Java still a work in progress.



Other than that, not much else has happened to me. Well, now that I think about it, there was this very interesting woman who came into Lowe's about a week ago. Its a long story and I'm tired of typing now so next time I will share the story. Until next time. :)

The Last Song(Blog) I Will Ever Write About A Girl(Brittany)

Believe it or not, this is a song and it won't be hard to find the artist. Like I've said before, google is an amazing tool.



So, as I am writing this my birthday is tomorrow. I will be turning 21, its hard to believe I've even made it this long. As I think about my life so far I'm having a hard time thinking of any good that I've done. In my life or others. Like seriously, what have I done to improve myself? You can't really say I've gone to college cause, for those who know, I've only gotten myself into debt here so far. I haven't really made myself very desirable to anyone. You may wonder why I'm worried about this, the reason: I'm afraid of being alone. I am completely, utterly, awefully, terrified of being alone for the rest of my life. This is where Brittany comes into play, she was my first love. When I met her I fell in love right away. I fell hard, I couldn't do anything without her, and she reciprocated. We had made plans to spend forever together, and this made me happy and made me think I had accomplished something. That I had someone to take care of, someone who needed me. It was great, it was the reason why I went to college in the first place. I knew I would have a family soon to take care of and I wanted to be the best I could be. So I went off to college. While I was at college Brittany started working more to fill her time while I wasn't around. Well, it turns out that while I was gone she found someone who made her happier than I could. Turns out it was her boss, who she was only around so much cause I wasn't there. As you can guess I was crushed. This sent me into a downward spiral, she broke up with me in the beginning of march and from that point I didn't care anymore. I never went to class, I didn't take any of my finals and I failed every class I took last semester. I was more or less a vegetable. So the school year ended and I came home cause I needed to be around family. It took me close to a 2 months at home before I got over it, with much help from family and friends. So I'm not exactly sure what that story has to do with anything I just felt like I should tell everyone cause I'm not sure that everyone knows what happened. It also sort of ties into one of Crystals recent blogs. I wanted to tell her that I know exactly how you feel. I wish I could just get over it all and move on but I can't. I still find myself thinking about her every night before I fall asleep, I know we will never be together again and even if the opportunity surfaced I wouldn't take it cause I know we would not work out. We just couldn't make it work, no matter how bad I want it. I just wish I could get the f*** over it already. So, I guess this brings me back around to my original point. What good have I done for myself in my 21 years of this test, this life?


Now don't get me wrong, I'm really excited about turning 21! It's a big milestone, they say I'm an adult now. I certainly don't act like one but I "technically" am an adult now. o.O scary isn't it. I have a lot of people telling me I have to go get drunk cause thats the only way to spend your 21st birthday, but I plan on just hanging out with Awbrey and Amanda playing hobowars. Cause thats what my life consists of these days. And if I'm feeling really crazy I might teach myself some Java. Sounds like a crazy night to me! Ok, well I'm sorry to bore you with my sob story, I promise I will be back to my boring hobowars and Java ways next post. :)

You've Got So Far To Go

So.......

I wonder if anyone will be able to figure this song out. Though, I just googled it and it was quite obvious. Oh well, its a good song you should listen to it. Ok, maybe Daniel will like it, and maybe Crystal but I doubt anyone else will care too much for it. One of my favorite bands, top 5 actually.



Well, nothing has happened since the last post but Hobowars is really slow right now, not many people are on so I'm bored. But I do have some good news on the hobowars front, my gang was able to get a strong fighter to join us, he has 26k stats(which is double mine!). This was a major breakthrough cause now we can be contenders in the War Chamber, also if you get one there is sure to be another to follow, at least I hope so. Thats about it on hobowars.



I haven't been able to work on any Java since I have been at work all weekend so as far as programming goes all I have is what I've done in the past. Like I promised last time, here is the page that I did for my gangs website. Its the error page. I would show the code but seeing as this accepts HTML it would just run the program and it wouldn't work cause it wouldn't be able to find the pictures used.


So, thats it. All it does is have the Home link at the top which takes you back to the gang page. Which here is the gang page for those who would like to see it. Its actually really cool.


Ok thats all I can think of right now. I hope you enjoyed reading. If not, oh well you ain't getting your time back.

All Systems Go

So this song is a little less known. Since its a little harder I will give a couple hints. First, the band only had one cd. Second, it was a side project of the guitarist of my favorite band of all time. And lastly, only one song made it to the radio, and this one wasn't it.




So not much has happened lately. Just the same old stuff. But something remarkable has happened, I figured out some more stuff on java. I figured out how to change the size of the window that I create, I also figured out how to, after hours of frustration, get a picture in the window as well. I was soooooo excited when it worked that I was jumping and screaming. I'm pretty sure my roommate thinks I'm crazy now but I was really stoked. So now for the part that no one understands, the code.

import javax.swing.*;
import java.awt.*;
import java.awt.event.*;

class hello {
public static void main(String[] args) {
JFrame f = new JFrame("YO!");
f.setLocationRelativeTo(null);
f.setBounds(100,100,640,480);

JPanel p = new JPanel();
p.setBounds(100,100,640,480);

JButton b = new JButton("Click Here For A Virus");

JLabel label=new JLabel(new ImageIcon("hobo_running.png"));

p.add(label);
p.add(b);
f.setContentPane(p);

f.show();

}
}


And of course, heres what it produces.





The picture is from hobowars, I used it previously on a webpage that I made for my gangs website. Maybe next time I will show that, which was written in a totally different programming language. Everyone knows it, HTML, and if you don't where have you been?!? Anyways, thats my programming boast. Also, kudos to Amanda for photshopping the original picture, which had a white background. Thanks again.


Thats about it for now. Until next time, adios.